Bill Simmons - Douche Nozzle

[Mustachio]

http://www.grantland.com/story/_/id/7026680/welcome-amnesty-20-nba

[SWedd523]

I've never really understood his hatred for Charlotte. Is it the fact that Jordan shits on Russell, Bird, Havlicek, and all the other Celtics greats?

Did Jordan turn him down for an interview?


p.s. Simmons has a gay mustache

[adam187]

Dunno if you guys noticed (it's changed now), but we were also originally listed as the Charlotte Hornets. Some things never change.

How easy it is to forget that no one even cared about the Celtics 5 years ago. Whatever. Oh yeah, and go Rays!

[Scottley Crue]

Perhaps he's still mad at the city of Charlotte for the Hornets knocking the Celtics out of the playoffs many moons ago. He's far too much of a Boston homer for me to take seriously. For that, I've used my personal amnesty clause on Simmons years ago. I'd urge everyone else to do the same.

[Chef]

i am playing devil's advocate. partly to make us come up with valid reasons why he is wrong and also to hopefully get some action on threads.

why would we not be a team that should be contracted if the nba was to contract 4 teams as simmons wants? i am looking for numbers ie revenue, season ticket holders, avg attendance, tv market, future success, ownership etc.

full disclosure: i am a simmons fan and enjoy his take on the league. i think his analysis is usually pretty good. he is obviously not a fan of most of the southern franchises but in all honesty his analysis on their prospects of long term success are pretty accurate. memphis, charlotte, new orleans and atlanta are usually playing in front of empty arenas and their cities don't care about them at all. one or more should go.

from a non-objective perspective, i absolutely don't want the bobcats to be contracted.

[SWedd523]

Chef, what would contracting the Bobcats say to future markets?

Why contract a team after less than a decade of operation? Growing pains should be attributed to everything, especially sports franchises in such a competitive market. Of course the Bobcats are going to have less history, less of a foothold, less viewers, etc.


We haven't even had a generation of fans grow up with the franchise yet. Aren't those usually the diehards? The, "I've watched them since the days of X and Y"? Not to mention the sour taste that accompanied the departure of the Hornets franchise.

If anything is certain, fans will show up for a winner. I remember the Paul Pierce/Antoine Walker Celtics teams that were terrible and played in front of empty crowds. Losing effects even the teams the most history.

Not to mention our team is owned by the most recognizable athlete in history, and the man who helped spread the game all over the world....... and the only minority owner. Imagine the backlash the league would get kicking MJ out of the ring.


We finished ahead of 9 teams in attendance last year. 3 of which were playoffs teams.

Ahead of 8 teams in 09-10
Ahead of 4 teams in 08-09
Ahead of 6 teams in 07-08
Ahead of 3 teams in 06-07
Ahead of 8 teams in 05-06
Ahead of 1 teams in 04-05



We have a terrible TV deal that affords the franchise minimal market saturation, yet they've been pulling in average crowds over the majority of the existence despite non-winning teams.


The teams that would/should be moved or contracted before us include the Hornets, Kings, Pacers, Grizzlies, and Hawks.

[ammofan]

I refuse to even read what he has to say. It's all 100% BULL CRAP.

[Chef]

Chef, what would contracting the Bobcats say to future markets?

Why contract a team after less than a decade of operation? Growing pains should be attributed to everything, especially sports franchises in such a competitive market. Of course the Bobcats are going to have less history, less of a foothold, less viewers, etc.


We haven't even had a generation of fans grow up with the franchise yet. Aren't those usually the diehards? The, "I've watched them since the days of X and Y"? Not to mention the sour taste that accompanied the departure of the Hornets franchise.

If anything is certain, fans will show up for a winner. I remember the Paul Pierce/Antoine Walker Celtics teams that were terrible and played in front of empty crowds. Losing effects even the teams the most history.

Not to mention our team is owned by the most recognizable athlete in history, and the man who helped spread the game all over the world....... and the only minority owner. Imagine the backlash the league would get kicking MJ out of the ring.


We finished ahead of 9 teams in attendance last year. 3 of which were playoffs teams.

Ahead of 8 teams in 09-10
Ahead of 4 teams in 08-09
Ahead of 6 teams in 07-08
Ahead of 3 teams in 06-07
Ahead of 8 teams in 05-06
Ahead of 1 teams in 04-05



We have a terrible TV deal that affords the franchise minimal market saturation, yet they've been pulling in average crowds over the majority of the existence despite non-winning teams.


The teams that would/should be moved or contracted before us include the Hornets, Kings, Pacers, Grizzlies, and Hawks.

excellent points. the grizzlies are tough considering there were a nose hair away from the WCF. i am thinking the hornets, kings, wolves and hawks. and the clippers relocating to st. louis. i also think the nba should seriously look at doing something with the pistons. that city/area is about a decade away from being mad max desolate. might as well move them before it gets that bad.

but if i were in charge in of the nba, i would require the bobcats to show that the entire states of north and south carolina and the eastern third of tennessee and the southern third of virginia show the bobcats as the home team and that the major companies show them even as an "outer market" team. i can tell you for a fact that in the triangle, no one and i mean no one could name 3 bobcats players.

it is very true that bob johnson was an absolutely terrible owner but it still does not excuse the fact that in the two years since he has left, the situation outside of charlotte city limits has not improved one bit. i am very aware that north carolina and the triangle in particular will always be a college basketball place but the bobcats situation here is atrocious. winning cures everything, but there is absolutely no nba presence here. would it kill the bobcats to fill a few highway billboards with bobcats stuff or advertise on triangle stations? would it kill the bobcats to offer promotions for triangle, fayetteville, columbia or roanoke residents? maybe throw in complimentary concession vouchers? buy four tickets get $20 in a gas card? free parking for purchasing four tickets? preseason camp in the triangle?

the reason why people like bill simmons think nobody cares about the bobcats is because outside of a few thousand fans in charlotte, nobody does. the bobcats are responsible for changing this whether we are winning or not.

[dnbman]

the reason why people like bill simmons think nobody cares about the bobcats is because outside of a few thousand fans in charlotte, nobody does. the bobcats are responsible for changing this whether we are winning or not.

Yeah, but isn't part of a sports journalist's job to illuminate what's going on in the game for people who don't know? If that's the case, why constantly take jabs at us without even giving any analysis?

I'm not naive. I understand that Bill Simmons is an entertainer first and foremost. He's not a true journalist. However, it's awfully hard for a franchise to get people to care when major media voices keep telling everyone they shouldn't care. He gives teams that have been worse than us the respect of actually talking about their players, but rarely ever has anything legitimate to say about us.

I don't think it's Bill Simmons fault that we have a marginal fan-base. However, I do think guys like him that cover sports and settle for two-bit laughs contribute to people not taking us seriously.

[stun704]

excellent points. the grizzlies are tough considering there were a nose hair away from the WCF. i am thinking the hornets, kings, wolves and hawks. and the clippers relocating to st. louis. i also think the nba should seriously look at doing something with the pistons. that city/area is about a decade away from being mad max desolate. might as well move them before it gets that bad.

but if i were in charge in of the nba, i would require the bobcats to show that the entire states of north and south carolina and the eastern third of tennessee and the southern third of virginia show the bobcats as the home team and that the major companies show them even as an "outer market" team. i can tell you for a fact that in the triangle, no one and i mean no one could name 3 bobcats players.

it is very true that bob johnson was an absolutely terrible owner but it still does not excuse the fact that in the two years since he has left, the situation outside of charlotte city limits has not improved one bit. i am very aware that north carolina and the triangle in particular will always be a college basketball place but the bobcats situation here is atrocious. winning cures everything, but there is absolutely no nba presence here. would it kill the bobcats to fill a few highway billboards with bobcats stuff or advertise on triangle stations? would it kill the bobcats to offer promotions for triangle, fayetteville, columbia or roanoke residents? maybe throw in complimentary concession vouchers? buy four tickets get $20 in a gas card? free parking for purchasing four tickets? preseason camp in the triangle?

the reason why people like bill simmons think nobody cares about the bobcats is because outside of a few thousand fans in charlotte, nobody does. the bobcats are responsible for changing this whether we are winning or not.
tl;dr sorry Bill Simmons is a 'retart' I have no idea why you are such a big "fan" of his.. absolutely ANYBODY can be a sports writer after a few classes in journalism and a passion for the sports. This talentless wackjob needs to be knocked off his high horse, somebody should amnesty him out of the world of sports.

[kickazzz2000]

excellent points. the grizzlies are tough considering there were a nose hair away from the WCF. i am thinking the hornets, kings, wolves and hawks. and the clippers relocating to st. louis. i also think the nba should seriously look at doing something with the pistons. that city/area is about a decade away from being mad max desolate. might as well move them before it gets that bad.

but if i were in charge in of the nba, i would require the bobcats to show that the entire states of north and south carolina and the eastern third of tennessee and the southern third of virginia show the bobcats as the home team and that the major companies show them even as an "outer market" team. i can tell you for a fact that in the triangle, no one and i mean no one could name 3 bobcats players.

it is very true that bob johnson was an absolutely terrible owner but it still does not excuse the fact that in the two years since he has left, the situation outside of charlotte city limits has not improved one bit. i am very aware that north carolina and the triangle in particular will always be a college basketball place but the bobcats situation here is atrocious. winning cures everything, but there is absolutely no nba presence here. would it kill the bobcats to fill a few highway billboards with bobcats stuff or advertise on triangle stations? would it kill the bobcats to offer promotions for triangle, fayetteville, columbia or roanoke residents? maybe throw in complimentary concession vouchers? buy four tickets get $20 in a gas card? free parking for purchasing four tickets? preseason camp in the triangle?

the reason why people like bill simmons think nobody cares about the bobcats is because outside of a few thousand fans in charlotte, nobody does. the bobcats are responsible for changing this whether we are winning or not.

I remember when hornets games used to come on Sportsouth and even local broadcasts in places like Charleston and Knoxville, TN

Now they aren't even on tv in mooreville

[lildwarf]

BOBCATS: Even with every deal they make driven by dollars, they still have some candidates. They could really slash and burn by dumping recently acquired Corey Maggette (2 years, $21 million). One-dimensional Matt Carroll has two years and $7.4 million. Or they could cut loose of DeSegana Diop (2 years, $14.2 million) to create eventual playing time for Bismack Biyombo, who may be the next DeSegana Diop.'

http://sheridanhoops.com/2011/09/29/nba-lockout-amnesty/