I don't come he but I read this and was in shock and had to share it. This is hilarious. This is a letter from Superhead to her husband. Dude needs to hand in his balls after this.
Sometimes, in relationships, the pleasure is all theirs. Alone, I am a superhero. With you, I am a mere mortal. You deplete me. Iím tired of being your upgrade. We are not equally yoked. You really deserve someone more basic. Iím tired of pretending your mediocracy is okay with me. Iím tired of pretending I donít miss G650′s. Iím tied of pretending youíre not a burden.Iím tired of pretending I donít deserve a f-cking BOSS! Iím tired of you driving my car. Stop telling me you love me as if youíre doing me some sort of favor. I donít need you to love me. I love me. Iím tired of pretending like you shouldnít be intimidated by the other men in my life. Cuz you should. Iím tired of pretending as if I support your bullshit dreams. Iím tired of pretending your d-ck isnít the smallest d-ck Iíve ever seen in my life. Cuz it is. Iím tired of pretending your favorite rapper didnít just beat it up on Friday. Iím tired of paying for everything.
Iím tired of you taking all this sh-t for granted as if you ever deserved any of it. Give me my Mac back. For real tho. Iím tired of washing your wack ass clothes. I hate your whole face. Iím tired of acting like the sex is good.I hate when you roll all the way over onto my side of the bed to hold me. Iím over here for a reason. Did I mention Iím tired of paying for everything? Okay.Iím tired of giving you the game.Iím tired of pretending youíre anything more than a bum. I shouldíve just hired you as a cook and kept it moving. Iím tired of congratulating you for accomplishing minuscule sh-t. Iím tired of you begging
Iím tired of moaning when I canít feel anything!Iím tired of having to think about someone else to get off. Iím tired of having to lock my phone when youíre around.Iím tired of taking showers with you. Can I get a moment! Damn! Yes. Heís better than you. Next question. All night. ĎTil 6 in the morning. Next question.Yes. And I didnít have to pay for none of it. Next question. Presidential suite. Next question. About 10 inches. Next question.69. Next question. Like a boss. Next question. Balls deep. Next question. Iím tired of having to pretend youíre not the 3rd worst decision Iíve ever made.
You should really be with that one chick who bagged our groceries this weekend. Thatís more your speed.