pres. raji: look guys, we all know we are the least athletic country per capita in the world. this is embarrassing. i mean freaking new guinea has more medals than us. what are we good at. i mean we are absolutely terrible at everything.
member taj: we are very good in cricket and elephant riding
pres: neither of which are olympic events. so lets pool a bunch of money together and figure out which obscure events we can win at.
member mahatma: i know, shooting doesn't require actual athleticism, let's do that. and of course there are the backyard games and we are close to asia, so let's give badminton a go and since most chicks aren't into boxing let's find one of our billion females who doesn't mind getting punched in the face.
pres: let's do it. scour the rice patties and computer call centers for talent and report back to me. meeting adjourned. the cricket match starts in 30 minutes.